You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. Genesis 50:20
I am thankful for my parents. I know, everyone is right. But I am thankful for something that they did so easily that they didn’t really notice that they were doing it. My parents helped me learn at a very young age that I was loved. They even put that love right into naming me.
Amy = Beloved.
The name Amy means beloved. God knew that I was going to need that deep rooted love. He knew that I was going to be raped and sexually assault at a young age by a friend to our family. He knew that I would rage at those around me and at Him.
But I never.
Questioned if my parents loved me.
I knew they loved me better than I knew my own feelings. It was so deeply rooted and tied down into my soul that looking back, I know it was a God thing. While my friends complained about their parents, and I did my fair share of complaining like most teens do, I could never say they didn’t love me.
That knowledge was a huge part of God being able to help me start to heal.
I was once told that Satan must have saw something so powerful in my life that he was scared at what I was to grow up to be. So, he tried to destroy me. He tried. But he didn’t do it.
But he did not succeed!
Genesis 50:20 says: “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” Every time I am blessed with the opportunity to tell my story, every time I am doubly blessed to sit and hear another woman’s story, I laugh at Satan. God turned this horrid part of my life into something wonderful covered in His crimson covered grace.
Someday, I pray I will be able to walk the streets of gold with my attacker. I pray for his marriage, his children, the community that he lives in. I pray for him. I pray that he’ll also find the crimson covered grace of Jesus Christ. People have asked if I would want this man in my life, in my children’s life. Honestly, not really. But I do want him in God’s family. Because once upon a time… …we were all sinners.
So, to my parents I say thank you. I want you to know that I have been blessed by you as my parents. I know, I wasn’t easy to raise. I know I fought with the twins a lot (ok, they did deserve it sometimes! LOL) but I want you to know that I know you did your best to raise me. And for that I am grateful.
I love you.